The other day while chatting with my girlfriends about everything under the sun - life, love, relationships and the like, one of my close friends said to me"You need to find your happy". This is the fourth time in the last couple of weeks "happiness" and "I" have been intertwined. My daily journal entries have centered on the questions like "Am I really happy"? What does happiness look like, again?" Just last week, one of my other close friends called me out of the blue and said "I just wanted to touch base with you, and check in and to see if you are happy?" Granted she was calling on behalf of something else, but the conversation was centered on "happiness". Lately, I find myself wondering if I have just been masquerading as "happy". Masquerading as if everything is normal and all is okay. Especially in an un-normal world. The universe has kicked "normal" out the door and planted "uncertainty" in it's place. I am deeply thankful for my life. However, there are some days when happiness seems to hide. Better yet, there are some days when I lay happiness aside, and I focus on just getting through the day without turning on tv to hear the latest craziness, or the number of people that have passed away. There are some days where happiness shows up during my morning walks, a gentle hug, a laugh, meditation, but quickly disappears. More days than not, I long for happiness to simply stay awhile.
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